By Ashley Sipocz
I have a confession. I violated a seemingly simple SNAP Challenge rule – avoid accepting free food. Admitting one failure is hard enough, but it’s even harder to admit that I failed not once but twice. Here’s how my SNAP Challenge fails unfolded:
Violation #1: The dinner meeting
For the first day and half, my SNAP Challenge was going fairly well. Food shopping on the SNAP budget wasn’t easy and I was hungry and tired more often, but I was sticking to the meal plan. Making it through week 1 was going to be tough but it didn’t seem impossible anymore until I was thrown a curve ball – a meeting for work.
I knew about the meeting, but I forgot about the dinner part until I arrived at work. I panicked. I didn’t bring enough food to avoid eating at the restaurant, and I didn’t have a car (my household shares one) to go home for food from my SNAP stockpile. I knew I would be hungry by meeting time, and as I’m sure my co-workers can now confirm, a caffeine-free, hungry Ashley isn’t a very pleasant experience (sorry, guys!). What was I going to do? I was going to try to do what many people who face food insecurity do every day – get through the day hungry.
But I couldn’t. As everyone prepared to order and with the smell of fried food in the air, I couldn’t say no. I didn’t want to have to explain myself and feel out of place while everyone else ate. I didn’t want to be rude to my fellow diner who was kindly purchasing the meal. But most of all, I was hungry, and it hurt. With another meeting, a 1.5 hour ride home to go that evening, and hunger pangs setting in, I had to eat.
Violation #2: Hungry away from home
On the way home that night, my colleagues and I had to take shelter at a hotel due to unsafe road conditions. In less than 24 hours, it was happening again – no access to my SNAP purchases, and I was getting hungry. Panic set in again, but it was different than before. It was the kind where it feels like there’s a butterfly in your chest and your mind is overrun with questions. What if my hunger pangs became too much again? How was I going to make it until morning? Where could I get food that wouldn’t break my budget?
If my hunger got really bad, I knew I could go buy some food at a restaurant or grocer nearby but for nearly 50 million American food insecure households, that’s not an option when they are hungry and without food. My very brief glimpse into food insecurity that day can’t compare to those who face it for weeks, months, or sometimes years, but the lack of choice and control I felt in those short moments was overwhelming.
That night and the following morning, I was fortunate to get something to eat thanks to free cookies and a continental breakfast at the hotel. While I’m disappointed in myself for breaking the Challenge rules, I honestly can’t say the free food wasn’t a relief both that day and for the rest of the week. Even though it was only two meals, it helped ease my anxiety about making my SNAP purchases last the whole week. A little help really can go a long way, especially when you get hungry.